Chaplain (Colonel) Niels C. Carlsen

My father-in-law, Niels Christian Carlsen, was a great man.  I’ve never met a man who loved and cared for people like him.  He was always in a good mood even when he wasn’t.  He was very kind all the time.  And he had a wonderful sense of humor.  He was one of those people who could even laugh at himself.  He was a church planter and pastor and had a career in the Air Force as a chaplain.

There was a time years ago when my wife and I and our children lived in Guatemala.  We relished our time there. The country and its people are beautiful.  I will say though that driving there was a challenge for this American.  In the U.S. we learn defensive driving.  You drive always being on the defensive for what the other person may do.  I found that in Guatemala to drive effectively you had to drive offensively.  That fits well with my personality.  I’m always on the offensive.

One time when my in-laws came to visit us, we took a trip out into the interior of the country.  They were certainly not used to or comfortable with an offensive style of driving.  I get it.  If you drove in the U.S. like most of the rest of the world does, people would not like it very much.  Needless to say, as I drove offensively, it frightened my in-laws. If you aren’t used to that type of driving, it can really be unnerving.  I’m currently visiting Lebanon.  I’d say the driving here is even more on the offensive than in Guatemala.  I find myself getting a little on edge with the driving.

I didn’t know that it bothered my in-laws so much because I was just driving the way that I always drove there.  At one point my father-in-law said to me something along the lines of, “I don’t appreciate the way you are driving; don’t you care for the safety of your family?”  I did take offense to that.  I stopped the car and had my wife take over on the return trip.  I didn’t say another word.

Soon after we got home there was something going on at church that I needed to attend.  I went out to the car and was getting ready to back out of the driveway when my father-in-law came out and asked if he could go with me to church.  I said, “of course.”  As soon as he got in the car, he apologized for what he said.  I apologized for scaring them.  What could’ve hurt our relationship didn’t. My father-in-law lived out biblical forgiveness.  

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as also God forgave you in Christ.”Ephesians 4:32

“Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”  James 5:16

Not only did my father-in-law live out those verses, but he also lived out Matthew 18 where it says for us to go directly to the one we have a problem with. Niels gave me a great example that I strive to emulate.